I cannot tell you, how tough it is, being the feline version of Alex Trebek!
I’m on set of the next Match 3 game and quite beside myself. I am sworn to secrecy about the outcome of the show but the behind the scenes scuttlebutt is always interesting for those who are enamoured with show biz. Let me tell you what I’ve been through over the past few weeks and especially this week . . .
First of all, we had to acquire (or should I meow, ‘reacquire‘) a number of those dressing room mirrors, surrounded by spotlights. It seems one of the last celebrity pets took a fancy to them and pilfered all the ones that were not bolted down.
And it took a great deal of persuading (💰💰💰💵💷💶💴💎) for the National Enquirer to squash the story about our other celebrity’s stint in the drunk tank. Luckily, our executive producer, Sundance, has a world famous lawyer, Purry Mason, on retainer and the mess went away without press coverage.
The celebrities for the next game show are proving to be just as rowdy. I cannot reveal who they are yet, nor do I want to cast aspersions about the questionable behaviour that has rendered me, frazzled, beyond recognition . . . But . . .
Our, short-fused, executive producer, Sundance, threatened to make sandwiches out of one of the celebrity pets. Which meant that I had to intervene. And in order to keep this ‘celebrity’ safe, I hid him in the closet with all the electrical wires! BIG MISTAKE!
We had a major black out and had to shut down production until that issue was resolved. You wouldn’t think such a little animal could cause the enormous amount of destruction which ended in rewiring the entire studio. Not even the Rolling Stones, in their heyday, would contemplate this kind of chaos!
The other celebrity then threw a diva fit, insisting we hire his own personal fur stylist in order to make his fur shine the brightest. And even before the first day of filming, there was a major ruckus regarding the incorrect swag that we provided. (These big stars live a whole other life compared to us little kitties). Apparently, the regular Lick-e-lix weren’t good enough! Only caviar Dreamies and fresh roasted turkey would do!
I’m happy to meow, the only bright spot has been ‘the contestants’. Both, Angel and the new one are huge fans of mine. It’s been ‘Yes, Mr. Tibbs . . . No, Mr. Tibbs . . . Has anyone told you, how good you look today, panfur?’ This is the kind of treatment, a big star such as myself, should be subjected to, on a daily basis.
If I can make it through this week, without the paparazzi causing a scandal, the next ‘Match 3’ will be ready at the beginning of June. (If I lose any more weight over this show, I may have to quit. 20.5 lbs & counting! Thank Cat, the camera 🎥 adds 10 lbs! 🙀🙀🙀)